Middle-aged Mormon Man


Monday, June 11, 2012

A New Van, the Policeman, and Miniscule (or Mighty?) Miracles

 This has been a great year for car trouble.  First the old '94 Suburban quit working, and we haven't been able to locate the new part we need...(anyone know where I can get a cheap alternator bracket? Oh, and I'd like the RIGHT alternator bracket, too, not the wrong ones that the lovely part stores keep ordering in.)  So it-the Suburban-is, therefore,  parked and going nowhere.  Then the registration was revoked on the big old Ford 250 truck because the "Check Engine" light is stuck on.  Then the registration was revoked on the little car (a Subaru? Honda? Toyota?  I don't know what it is) because it didn't pass emissions...I mean, what's a girl to do??? Quit driving???  So we started looking on Craigslist for a new family van.  We found one, and on Memorial Day morning, I drove over to my father-in-law's house to drop off the kids with grandma & to go look at the van with gramps.  And my, what a memorable Memorial Day it turned out to be...

On the way to Grandpa & Grandma Hansen's, I got pulled over.  I had the 4 kids, Travis was at work, and I was driving his  little car because the truck was acting up and I didn't dare drive it. 3 car seats don't fit in the back seat, so Zoe and Abbee were in the back with car seats, and Zac was buckled in the middle without a car seat, and Lizzie was in a car seat in the front.  So the officer says, "Do you know your registration has been revoked on this?" 
I answered, "Yes, I do.  It failed emissions and my husband has tried fixing it several times, but it won't pass inspection still."  Then I pulled the Craigslist ad out of my purse and showed him the van we were going to see and said, "That's why I am headed to see this."
"Well, I'm sorry, but I have to give you a ticket for that, it's $94."  So then some silly little tears started sneaking out of my eyeballs, and I said, "OK, I understand."  Then he looked in the back seat and asked how old the kids are.  I told him, and he said, "I also have to give you a $79  ticket for your 6 year old being out of a car seat. Can I ask you why he isn't in one?"  I told him I couldn't make 3 car seats fit back there.  He said, "Well, why don't you all get out and let me see what I can do."  So we all get out, standing at the side of the road in downtown Meridian with everyone we know driving by with the cops lights flashing and the cop half in and half out of our car.  He had the kids get in one by one as he wiggled seats and buckled them in.  He made it work, and Lizzie was old enough to be up front with no car seat. 
"There!  he said, "Now I don't have to give you that ticket, but the other one I still do.  Can I see your insurance and registration cards?"
So I opened the jockey box, hoping it was all in there, and out tumbled all these big giant bullets...ugh...
Him-"Ummm, so what are all the (rifle shells or shotgun shells can't remember what he called them)  for?" 
 Me- "Uhh...I REALLY have no idea.  This is my husbands car." (You know, when all else fails, blame someone else.)
Him-"You have no idea?"
Me-"Not really, well, maybe he used them to shoot antelope in Wyoming, but I'm not sure."
"These look kind of slow for shooting antelope."
"Well, then, I don't know what he shoots with them."
"Well, can I see one of them?"
"Sure."  and as I hand him one, I notice they are all sticky and greasy and gross.  "Umm...they are kind of dirty." I say as I hand him one.
"What is this residue on them?"
I take a deep breath "It's...uhhhh...peanut...oil?
"Peanut oil?"
"Yeah. Peanut oil."
He looks at me quizzically and says, "Why do they have peanut oil on them?"
(Really?  Do I have to tell this STUPID story???? But I couldn't think of anything better, so I had to just tell him the dad-gummed STUPID truth.)  I take another deep breath. "My husband's hunting vest hangs on a nail in the garage and apparently it fell off the hook sometime over the winter and landed in a bucket.  And sometime else the big jug of peanut oil for frying a turkey fell off the  shelf and landed upside down in the bucket and broke open and the bucket with my husband hunting vest and lots of those big bullets in the pockets filled up with peanut oil.  We couldn't salvage the hunting vest, but his lucky hunting hat is ok, and he wiped the giant bullets off and unbeknownst to me put them in the jockey box, and they are apparently still greasy."
Me-(silently praying, waiting for the handcuffs.....)
"Well, I'm going to go back to my car and [laugh my head off] check out your information, so just sit still for a while."  What? While he calls the SWAT team?  What if Trav's guns are in the back?  Is that illegal????
Then Zoe (age 5) hands me up her handful of coins.  "Here, mom, you can have my money to pay the ticket.  Do you have to go to jail now?"
"No, honey I'm not going to jail." (I HOPE!!!)

Well, the nice officer finally came back, and said, "Everything checks out.  I'm just giving you warnings today, but someone else might pull you over.  Get this car fixed, ok?"
So we bought the mini van, my husband fixed the little car so it finally passed emissions, and we are now the proud owners of two, yes, you read that right TWO legally licensed vehicles.  From 0 to 2 in a day and a half.  That's a mighty miracle indeed! Oh, and the no tickets?  That is another mighty miracle!
And that is my story.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Is anybody out there still?

Wow!  I've taken a LOOONG hiatus from the blogging world.  Life just seemed to be so crazy that I had to drop out of a bunch of things.  And I'm SURE none of you feel the same way in your calm, organized, predictable lives! ;P   Yeah, I know, we are all extremely busy and extremely overstretched.  Hasn't life just got busier and busier and busier?  How do you slow it down?  Since I'm sure the answer to that question is, "You can't." then how do you pick and choose what you have time for and what you will let go?  I think this video is a big part of the answer.  Click on this link:
 What Matters Most
Isn't that a lovely reminder?
One of those things that matters most is family.  And guess what?  I'm gonna be a grandma!  Yep, indeed!  It is true!  My oldest son and his beautiful wife, Salise are going to have a baby!  Oh hooray!  What is better than a fresh, new baby straight from heaven? They are due July 20th...I am so excited!  My lovely SIL, Kally, and my bro, Joel,  had their beautiful baby, Jazlyn, and my lovely little sister, Tiffany, and her hubby, Mike,  had their beautiful baby, Spencer just in the last week or so.  Hurray for new babies!

Sunday, July 12, 2009


I was looking on www.sugardoodle.net for a cute quote to go with prayer for girls camp, and found this cute idea!
The Pretzel: A Reminder of Prayer
In about 610 A.D. a very creative Alpine Monk decided to make use of the pieces of dough left over from baking bread. The Monk formed them into thin strips folded into a looped twist to represent the folded arms of children in prayer.
This scrumptious treat was given to the children as they learned their prayers. They began calling the treat "Pretiola", which is Latin for "little reward". Soon it was known the world over as a pretzel.
The secret of making great pretzels is not only in the baking but also in the shaping. We, like pretzels, are made from the best ingredients, by the best hands available, the hands of our Father in Heaven.
Have you ever seen a broken pretzel, or one that's lost its shape? We too, can lose our shape when we don't pray always to keep our spirituality intact. Even in the midst of our greatest trials, we must remember, as did Job, to call on the Lord. The simple shape of the pretzel, arms folded in prayer, reminds us to pray each day. Our "Pretiola" or "little rewards" are the blessings we receive.
Every time you see a pretzel, remember prayer. Check to see if your arms are often folded in prayer and have not lost their shape.
Here are a couple different pretzel recipes. You can make them large like the ones sold at Pretzel stands, or a bunch of small ones .
Cheesy Soft Pretzels by Annette Wrigley
1 1/2 c. flour
1/2 c. shredded cheese
2 tsp. baking powder1 tsp. sugar
2 Tbsp. cold butter
2/3 c. milk
1 egg, beaten
Coarse salt
In a bowl, combine flour, cheese, baking powder, sugar, and salt. Cut in butter until crumbly. Stir in milk - just to moisten. Knead 1 minute. Divide in half. Roll each portion into a 12X8 inch rectangle. Cut in strips and twist into pretzel shape. Pinch ends together. Place on a greased pan. Brush with beaten egg and sprinkle with coarse salt. Bake at 400° for 12 to 15 minutes. Serve immediately. Makes 1 1/2 dozen.

Homemade Pretzels by Paige Holden
1 Tbsp. dry yeast
3/4 c. warm water
1 Tbsp. sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
2 c. flour
1 egg, beaten
Coarse salt
Wax paper
Mix yeast in warm water. Add sugar and salt. Add flour and mix. Put dough on wax paper and knead until soft. Cut off pieces and shape as you like (too thick = doughy, too thin = brittle). Place them on a cookie sheet. Brush with beaten egg and sprinkle coarse salt. Bake at 425° for 12 to 15 minutes.

Isn't it darling and fun? So this will be part of tomorrows Family Home Evening lesson, and then we'll make the pretzels for refreshments. I'm thinking cinnamon and sugar would be very good on them, drizzled with a bit of glaze...mmm....

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Tayzia's(late) Birthday Post

My tiny little Tazmania is now 17. And a senior. Holy cow! How did that happen so fast?
Here's some of the reasons why I think she is so fabulous.

She takes awesome photos.
She is gentle and loving.

She was brave enough to cut off her long hair, and she looks GORGEOUS!
She helps out in the kitchen.

She goes to the Easter Egg Hunts each year with me.

She does funny things on the trampoline.

She is sweet and kind.

She is as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside.

She likes to be silly and goof around with her siblings.

One night we came home late after a date, and found this:
Precious, huh?

Her dance partner in ballroom dancing a few years back was her sweet Down's friend, Josh, and he thought he was the king of the dance floor with Tayzia as his partner!

She loves her siblings.

She doesn't wear shoes anymore. She started an organization to help others who have no shoes and is trying to collect shoes to send to Sudan. Check out her link Click Here .

Did I say that she loves her siblings??? They love her too! Here they are pouring leftover egg dye in the ditch. It was really pretty:)

She was in the Dance Festival this year at Taco Bell Arena.

The kids LOVE when she gets to babysit them, because they know they will get to party and have F-U-N!!!

And she eats her veggies.

Tayzia, I'm so grateful that you are my daughter! I love you to pieces and am so proud of you! You amaze me with your kind heart, your brilliant brain, and the love you have for others. Of all the seventeen year olds on this planet, you truly are my favorite! And I mean it. You're the best! I'm thankful that Heavenly Father sent you to me. I love you!

Love, Mom

Friday, June 26, 2009

Cool Giveaway

Check out this cool new blog I discovered off my sister, Tiffanys blog: The Buzz. The gal from The Buzz is giving away a nursing bracelet from Chunky Monkey Toes.
These are my three favorites:

Way cute, huh?
The bracelets help you keep track of when you nursed last and on which side by using a moveable charm...very important info for all the nursing mothers....boy I could've really used this a few years ago! If I win, I'll give it to you, Tiff!

The Horrors of Blogging

So, I decided to finally check blogs...and I didn't get very far...As I was reading on Val's blog, I noticed a smell. "MMmmm....I thought, "it smells really good in here, kind of like...SKIN SO SOFT! Oh GREAT!" I turned and looked and there was Zoe giggling and dumping a bottle of Skin-So-Soft Bath OIL all over herself, Zac, and the couch...grrr...so I got a roll of paper towels to clean up the oily (but lovely smelling!) mess (anyone know how to get an oilspot about 2 feet long and a foot wide out of a couch???)...then I returned to reading the blogs...until I heard a CRASH!!!! At which time I discovered another one of my darling off-springs had accidently pulled out THE DRAWER. Not just any, normal drawer, mind you, but THE drawer. You know the one that collects all the little odds and ends and this's and thats's and is crammed full of all the CONFOUNDED JUNK THAT SHOULD'VE JUST BEEN THROWN AWAY IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!!??? Yeah, THAT one. Well, that's the one that got pulled out and spilled all over the kitchen floor....GRrrrr...so then I came back to read the blogs again....and then I heard a "PLOP! fzzzzzzzssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." "GRAND! THAT sounded BAD!" I thought as I quickly decided AGAINST Option #1 (which was running out the door and screaming down the street while tearing out my hair) and decided Option #2--though less desirable--was more appropriate (which was crawling into the kitchen and peeking around the corner through half-covered eyes to see what kind of horrors awaited me.) And low and behold! A GREAT surprise greeted me...50# of rice. On the floor. (Can I just crawl under the table and hide til Travis comes home??? OH, BUT WAIT. HE'S ON AN OVERNIGHTER WITH THE SCOUTS!!!! Guess that answers that question...GRRRRRRR!) But there is a bright spot to the 50# of rice issue, my lovely Tayzia had just mopped the floor about 45 minutes ago before she left, so the floor was spotless ('cept the rice...and the drawer contents...) so most of the rice was salvageable...So we got that taken care of and I came back to the living room to get back to catching up on blogs (will I ever learn???) and I find Zoe has torn up the whole roll of paper towels that I left out from cleaning up the SkinSoSoft....so what do I do? Turn off the computer? NOPE! I decide to write down this lovely experience for all you to read... and sadly enough, I'm really bummed that I didn't take pictures to post (I KNOW!!! What was I thinking...) Oh well, the night's still young, I wonder (dread!) what's going to happen next...

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Happy Birthday, Zac!

This morning Zaccy came and climbed in my bed for a good morning snuggle. I whispered in his ear, "Yesterday you were my favorite 3 year old in the whole wide world! I'm so sorry, but today, you are not my favorite three-year-old any more." You should've seen the the glare from those big blue eyes! Then I hurried and said, "Because today you are my favorite four-year-old in the whole wide world!" He giggled and gave me the best four-year-old hug that I've had in ten days. (Nine days ago Abbee turned 5, so ten days ago, I got a super-great 4 year-old hug from her :)

In honor of Zacharias Henry Hansen's 4th Birthday, here's a list (in random order) of some of my favorite things about my 5th child:

1. He has big blue eyes and long dark lashes.

2. He is goofy.

3. He's kind-hearted.

4. He gives awesome hugs.

5. He is really good at sharing.

6. He tells me "I wuff woo!" often.

7. He is named after John the Baptist's father who it is said, in Luke 1:6 was "righteous before God, walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless."

8. He has great facial expressions.

9. He loves his sisters and big brother, and isn't afraid to show it or tell them.

10. He has perfect faith in me.

11. He is always cracking us up with his silliness.

12. He loves Jesus.

13. He loves to wrestle.

14. He is friendly.

15. He likes to take weird pictures with my camera.

16. He's Tayzia's Transformer buddy.

17.His smile is contagious.

18.He falls asleep in the car.

19. And did I say that he is goofy?

Tayzia and Zac ready to leave on his Sister Birthday Date.

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